Sunday, September 4, 2011

Words Will Come...

I'm pregnant. Fourteen weeks and two days, to be exact.

I'm blank and a little bit numb. I don't know how I feel about it yet. I'm sure deep (deep, deep, deep) inside I am thrilled. But on the surface I am still a bit confused. There are times when I completely forget about the little human growing inside me and I start to make plans for vacations and large purchases and then I realize that by then I'll be too fat to do anything. And then there are times when I sit in wonder if it'll be a boy or a girl and my mind gets extremely creative with potential names for both genders.

Things are complicated right now. Not exactly stable in more ways than one. I just started a job as a teller at Wells Fargo about three months ago and I had plans to go back to school and do so many things. Things that I had never had the opportunity to do because of my legal status and then because I had little boys who needed me or because I was always broke or tired or busy......and right when I was getting ready to branch out and make me proud of me, I get knocked up.

I suppose it will all be OK. It always has been.

I wanted to write more, but I am still blank.

Words will come....